A Story by Lucienne

The evening she came the air from outside sifted through the old windows, bringing the smell of black ants, wet garbage and stale urine into my room. A storm had been crawling along lazily over the coast, feeding off of the vapors the people released before leaving the Spring break festivities. Long after the hyperbole panic on TV I knew I would be without power, but I didn't give it any thought and went about the day as every other day. The sameness feels safe. When the lights gave off it took with it the fans, the air purifier, the timed scent fresheners and the coolness of my enclosure that keep the festers from outside in their place. This is one of the big reasons I have to fix that window. 

My head and back strained and palpitated. Time for another white pill. I had much to do and I needed the sleep. I got a drink from the already lukewarm fridge. Had to be careful not to prop it open again. As I blindly placed the empty bottle of water on the kitchen table I was startled and reached for it thinking it was about to fall. I heard a set of knocks that were out of place. I see below the door there is movement, a shuffle. To the tune of my palpitations another knock breaks the rythmic low hum of my thoughts. I gave an exhasperated sigh as I saw it was too dark to look through the door peephole. I opened every lock and turned the knob and the door was open halfway to reveal a figure soaked wet, clothed in a heavy plastic poncho. I couldn't make out the face but felt the wetness. And that smell.

-Hello. Could you help me with some candles? I'm not done moving yet. 

I looked down the hallway after she stepped back and could make out the shapes of luggage placed in disarray about the hall two doors away from mine. 

-Won't be long. Promise.

-Okay. But don't stay out here, please come in.

-Mmhm.

Girls these days seem to forget to be polite to other girls, I thought. I know I would regret it when I told her to give me a couple of minutes, I still needed to make sure my appliances weren't plugged. I had heard thunder rolling closer. 

-It's fine. That way we talk.

Well, sure, talk away. I began to prepare my synapses for another bout of daydreaming. This I found to be quite effective when dealing with people and their jabber. In general. Nothing like a bit of mental travelling. The numbness of those excellent pills I took would help. I did pick up her self-important tone and her accent while I did my multiple mental chores. She must have been talking still when I began to ask. 

-Where are you from? That accent is-

-I asked something first.

I didn't know what to say. There was some movement and she broke the silence.

-From all over.

-Oh.

I absolutely hate that expression. 

-Yeah. Been to places. This place is neat. You on't go out much?

Oh a traveller. Noticed I don't get out much, why not rub it in some more? Please. I'm about ready to sink my teeth into the fridge three-way plug and wait for the power to come on. She must have been everywhere, tasted everything, not a care in anything, like gaining a few pounds. She would shake them off in a second, no problem. Not like the fatties counting calories, spending nights on the gym and injecting anabolics. She's slender. I can't see it, but I can tell; I can feel her lightness in the room. She probably works from home or from a huge office where there's no room for failures and socially awkwards. 

-Can I ask you something? It's silly.

-Ask.

-Do you have those candles?

-Oh yes. I have got to tell you though, they have been buried here for the longest, so they might not catch a fire.

-Hm.

I feel myself sinking into thought again while I get the hopefully very worn out candles. This time I call on the travel show where I've seen places I'm never meant to be. This time I'm going to the remote and beautiful islands of the Azores. I'm working the land, building my own house, planning the next adventure around the forest, cooking for twenty, pouring wine, fucking a toasted sailor about to leave forever. I'm doing deeds I've watched done only on movies and I take everyone with me to a land where one day in your life does not go without doing something meaningful. I'm helping the lost get lost, I matter.

The thread of my dreaming wears thin and thwangs suddenly when I realize she's still talking.

-The best time I've had so far in my travels, was in the Azores.

How in the fuck. I feel my left eyelid tremble fiercely. My head and back pain soar to unnamed heights.

-Really.

-Was that a question?

-No. Nevermind.

She takes a light breath and continues her anecdote. I find the candles in a box on my kitchen closet but I have to stop her mid-sentence.

-You did what over there?

-I just told you. You don't listen. You're a terrible host. I said I worked the land, built my own house, planned an adventure around the forest, cooked for twenty, poured wine to all, I even fucked a sailor. 

I'm doing deeds I've watched done only on movies and I take everyone with me to a land where one day in your life does not go without doing something meaningful. I'm helping the lost get lost, I matter. That's about it... right?

She stands up. I heard a hint of laughter between words. This head of mine isn't getting any better. Where are those pills.

-Listen. You.

-You know my name.

Then I saw, I became aware. Her left hand peeked out of her poncho and it looked familiar. Her hand was all I could see. I look down into my own and it's my hands. Sameness. And her voice. I couldn't perceive it earlier. 

-You're really something.

There's a buzzing noise in my ears that just won't stop.

-You stay here in the dark where you think I can't come knocking.

What is it, bees?

-I'm not a construct, and not impossible. I'm happening every time you doze off and fail to move in time before the big train of rational thought comes rushing in.

Sounds like a swarm inside a storm.

-And I want out.

And that thunder?

-See?

A match is struck somewhere to my right and a pale, feeble light comes on. I see her face, and it is impossible. She is impossible. And she can't stay. I grab her by the veil of her face and bring her closer. The swarm buzzes loudly as her face nears my face. I turn her around, so thin and light, grabbing her by the shoulderblades and place both hands around her throat like a locked tourniquet. I feel for her trachea and press. The cartilages shift and pop out of place. I press harder, breathing away from her, catching what's left of the healthy air around my room. She's going limp. First, her head, then her hands, finally her wet feet. All her systems giving in, turning off one by one after transmitting the last silent signals. As the shape plummets to the carpeted floor I hear the drone of electricity coming back, blinking the lightbulbs into existence. She has finally stopped talking. She's left my room.

Written by Lucienne LopezdeVictoria

in reply to "Notes on a life forgotten"

A Reply to Notes on a Life Forgotten

As I read that blog entry I could somewhat relate to this person. I have my moments of insecurity, as well as days when I'm feeling depressed. This person however is at the very least a boderline sociopath. It's actually quite sad. 


I can't even picture my life without the connections I've made with the select few people that I can honestly say make me want to be here now. I know I have to put on a mask at times and play a role. I do that every day at some point or another, although I must say that some people play the role a little too much. I'm not one for kissing ass and saying shit to people just cuz it's what they wanna hear. If I have nothing good or nice to say to someone then I just keep my mouth shut. 


We all have that inner voice, the "little devil" or "angel" on our shoulder, that is always there. Mine is twisted, morbid and goddamn funny. There have not been many people that have seen that side of me, but those that have know what I mean. Some others only see part of it. I only show what I want to show and it makes things less complicated. Some people just don't get it, and they never will, but that's ok. I know that if some of the people I interact with on a daily basis could read my mind I would probably get arrested or thrown into a mental health facility. I know I'm not crazy, but I like that I am the way that I am. 


Yeah I'm a little fucked in the head, but at least I know it and admit it. I like the "dark" side of me. It makes me laugh. It entertains me. It helps me get through the mundane every day bullshit I have to put up with. It keeps me sane and balanced. So yeah I went off on a rant, but those of you that read this are used to it right? 


So to wrap this up, if you go through life without making true emotional connections with people and having real relationships, then you have nothing to look back on and nothing to look forward to. You have nothing of true substance in your life. I may not have much, but at least I have something.


Written by Thomas Ortiz
in reply to "Notes on a life forgotten"

Wars, Warriors and Warbles

We fight these mini wars

Our haphazard lives
Like stale pastries
Haste filled
We brave these days like stealthy warriors
We wake up listening to the warbles
Of the radio,
The coffee maker and each other.
Before we know it
Another day closes
Like a curtain over the stages of our lives
Each intermission
Longer than the last
These indefinite performances continue
Improvised roles become memorized litany
Nothing's random
Nothing's new
And all that's left is
The aftertaste
Of the stale pastry
The taste of yesterday
Same as today
Same as it will be tomorrow

And the horror that it can't be washed away
And so the wars begin again after a night's escape that felt like the blink of an eye
The warriors march on
Mumbling In response to the consistently plaguing warble...


Written by Zaida Ruiz
in response to "Notes on a life forgotten"

A challenge for friends and friends of friends.

Sam and I were talking about something I wrote a while back and we thought it was a good idea if people read it and create something based on that piece. 


There is one rule it has to be based on the original writing.


It can be a poem, a sketch, a reply to it, anything at all. I will post it on my blog as a new entry.


If you are up for it read http://lordrox.blogspot.com/2011/04/notes-on-life-forgotten.html and send me what your finalized project is to lordrox@gmail.com.


Thanks Sam for working this one out with me glad we spoke about it.


RoX over and out.

After three days: WP7

After about 72 hours with the new phone there are somethings I want to clear up, add or just clearly make up excuses for.

Lets get started. The Google Calender omission, there isn't one it's there you just have to know where to look. Settings>email & accounts>Google the click calender. I had to restart the phone to get it to sync but it did!!! So those of us who use Google calender will be happy to know that the option is there.

The email deletion without opening up the email thing. There is also a way to do that, the design is a bit odd but it works. click in front of the email then tick boxes show up with one of the options at the bottom of the screen being delete. Since there are tick boxes multiple email delete is a possibility which is great.

Now going back to Google calender for a minute, in my defense I will blame Palm and webOS for this (lol). It's called Synergy. When you first load up a webOS device it asks for you accounts what you want added and if one of them is a gmail it syncs email, contacts and calender in one shot. No need to configure this.

There is also no "Just Type" or Universal search from the main screen and this makes me a sad panda. I really miss that.

I also miss the phnx Twitter app, But that's not something WP7 can help.

Speaking of Apps the Marketplace doesn't have a search option. If it does I can't find it and it's really annoying. Having to scroll through all of the apps to find the one you want sucks. If you know the name of the app you should have a search option. Type and go. 
UPDATE: There is a search option just not on the Marketplace itself you have to use the Search Button next to the Windows key to search. At every other point in time this brings up Bing. 

The virtual keyboard is really good, probably the best I have used. Also the auto-correct is awesome. I liked the auto-correct in webOS 1.4.5 a lot I didn't like it too much in webOS 2.1 but WP7's works really well. I do have a physical keyboard but I find it awkward to use a landscape keyboard I like. Besides the WP7 team did a great job with the virtual one that I don't even feel the need to use the other one. I think webOS can use a virtual keyboard on the pre 3 or larger screen phones.

I am still digging this phone and the OS. It has been 3 days and I am not wanting to return it unless a pre 3 is coming within 30 days. I'll be back in a few days to let you know how it's going for the week.

RoX over and out.

After one day: WP7

So I did it. I broke down and got a new phone. I am saddened by the fact that it isn't a Palm phone (sorry the HP thing is very foreign to me). I ended up switching to the HTC Arrive running Windows Phone 7. After 2 years running webOS and a brief stint with Android with a little sprinkle of Blackberry in between I switched. Now mind you I am still well within my return period for this phone (come one Palm and Sprint give me a Pre 3 soon) so who knows how this is going to go. Here are my thoughts on the phone and the OS.

The hardware:

With the Arrive we get a 1Ghz CPU so it's plenty quick (I have a Pre 2 for App Development with an equally fast processor). My main phone was a Palm Pre which we OG Pre users call the Pre minus which had a 500Mhz CPU. So the difference is very noticeable just going through menus and such. The screen size is bigger on the arrive but not monstrous clocking in a 3.6 inches which is a good in between in my opinion. I have always like the design of the HTC phones so if you have never paid attention to them check them out. It's a super solid phone then again it's an HTC.

Enough about the hardware the real deal for me is software namely the operating system. Having used a lot of the different OS's out there (sans Symbian) I feel like I can comment on all of them. Since this is my first day with a Windows Phone 7 device I will talk about how this OS compares to the rest of them. Now let me get this out in the open I hate Android I mean absolutely hate it and as far as iOS goes it was awesome 2 years ago, Now that I wrote that we can move on.

The Software:

Windows Phone 7 (we will abbreviate that as WP7 from now on if that's ok) has a very unique look to it. The main menu is a bunch of squares called Live Tiles which give you info at a quick glance (sometimes) to me it is the most daring interface design of them all. Many call it ugly some say it's beautiful, I think it is very cool looking and ballsy. Everything from the cut off text to animated tiles it has a really clean but extremely modern look to it. When you look at the Blackberry for instance it's very boring (yes I know it's functional but it's fucking boring) and bland. With Android the screen can get too cluttered with icons (cough iOS cough) and with webOS you get the super clean minimalist look. 

Going through the menu on WP7 is like going through a list unlike iOS, Android and webOS which are more icon and small text, it's more small icon and the text is right next to it. There are no pages for the apps everything appears in a list form in the sub menu that is accessed by a swiping gesture.  

Now onto functionality. Customization is a big one for people let me hit that one first. So yeah in WP7 you can change the background color, the color of the tiles, location and what tiles are on the main menu...that's about it.  No you can't use your own ringers for stuff so there goes that. I mean to me I could care less about ringers because I keep my phone on silent anyway. But the option would be nice.

I like how streamlined everything is in the OS (minus email more on this in a bit) you have to see it to understand it. I am digging it so far. It runs smooth with no lag the transitions are really nice to look at and since all phones with WP7 look and feel the same anyone can use any of the WP7 devices (Fucking Android and you letting people skin your OS). Xbox live integration is great having access to netflix is really cool (not the first phone to do this but it's still cool). Good experience so far I recommended it once already to my cousin before I got a chance to play with the OS and it worked out fine for him. I was interested in WP7 for a while now so I why not give it a try (read: forced by Palm and Sprint with the lack of webOS based devices) and I am impressed.

Now there are things that I don't like about WP7 that I have become accustomed to (read: spoiled) thanks to webOS.

One is multitasking, I can't stress this enough. being a able to have 3 apps open at the same time and switch between them all is so great that it makes it to the top of the list of things I don't like. Being able to text switch to Facebook and Twitter and check email without closing any of those programs is good very good =). I don't mean multitasking the way Android does it that you need an app killer to close out the programs or the way iOS does it with the little freeze frame pictures. No one has a better multitasking system than webOS plain and simple. Pure elegance.

Two is unified email inbox. I have 5 email addresses (don't ask) and I have to switch to a different email client every single address. I really hate this. Can't I just have all my emails come to the same client and let me go through them? It's pretty annoying.

Three I want to be able to press enter to send a text. Yes just like it sounds. I don't want to press a send button when I have an enter key. So simple.

Four text and IM threading. The ability to go from text to IM with the same person on the fly without switching apps.

Five access to Google Calender. Yes I know it's a Windows Phone but you know you should have access to your google stuff since you are allowed to have your gmail and google contacts. Just Saying.

Now I love webOS wish I could have it now. These 5 things aren't deal breakers they are just what I got 2 years ago with webOS. These are 5 things I miss the most but I know not every OS can be as elegant and as straight forward as webOS. Apple has great hardware they need to re think how the operating system is running it worked well a few years ago now it is just cluttered and unrefined with their horrid notification system and stupid folders. Blackberry is a lost cause. Android whatever it's as big as it is because no device manufacturer has to pay for it. That's right I said it why pay for sex with Olivia Wilde when you can fuck Megan Fox for free, sure it's not Olivia Wilde but it's free.

WP7 is a very young OS and a lot of this is supposed to be addressed with the Mango update but really this was in webOS on the day of release 2 flipping years ago. And no Microsoft is not the only OS that is missing some of these things but I am using WP7 at the moment so there you go. 

I will still recommend WP7 big time because it is daring, different and very user friendly. 

Now the fanboys remember these are my opinions and I know you will not agree and I don't care. If you want to talk about the differences cool but be intelligent about it.

RoX over and out.

Notes on a life forgotten.

The problem with life is living through it all and staying sane.

Take me for example, I appear to be pretty normal. I have friends that I talk to and I have no problems speaking to people and making new relationships.

My problem lies inside, my personal persona. I am truly two people. The public person that is generally likable and well intentioned. When I am alone it all changes. I have severe bouts of insecurity, paranoia and depression.

Things are not simple for me at all, the lies and truths I tell the world around me always gets second guessed and thought about to death and I always think how everyone around me can see who I really am. I am just a small and insignificant person. As I drive alone I am filled with self loathing. I don't even like to look at myself.

For you my friends I am Pesci's clown, I am here to amuse you, so the time you spend with me is not spent thinking about your own bullshit. Focus on the here and now have fun and deal with your problems later. The issue with me is that I never leave my self hatred behind it is always with me like a large satchel.

As I space out I think how much nicer it would be not to have to think about anything or worry about anything anymore. The more I look at this option the harder it is for me to cling on to this worthless life where any dream I may have had is non existent or has turned into a nightmare.

I don't want to put up a front anymore. I would love to truly be the person I pretend to be but after all of this time I know I can't be. That person that you all see isn't truly me it is a character I have created to gain acceptance throughout the years.  This facade that has been built and polished has almost become a true person but I see the cracks. I see every single one. I don't know how much longer I can keep this up. It is getting harder for me to even drive with out wanting all of it to just end.

I am no longer in control it seems like my true self is coming through and showing how detached I really am. I hate people, I hate standing next to them, I hate the fact that I share the same air.

I can't seem to even control most of my thoughts everything is becoming more erratic more confused everyday seems longer and my thoughts are tearing me apart as I write this I know most everything around me is a lie and I can't take that anymore.

I have hurt a lot of people in my life I yet I feel nothing. My insecurities are destroying me. With this I hope you know this isn't anyone's fault. I want you all to know our relationships are over and I don't want to be anyone's puppet. 

Just forget that I existed and know you never truly knew me.

The Separation of Ideals

As a person who wants to makes games for a living and loves to play games it is always distressing how mediocre some games are and yet they have million dollar budgets. One game always comes to mind is Call of Duty, a game that for all intents and purposes is considered one of the best franchises for FPS (first-person shooters) Black Ops as decent as it was has more than a few issues but truly hasn't changed since Infinity Ward's amazing Call of Duty 4. 


Some can argue that if it ain't broke don't fix it, well what about innovation or just trying something new? What about making a Call of Duty game just for multi player and one for single player? This is the separation I am talking about. I know more than a few people who do not enjoy multi player games (me included)I would rather have something co op or highly story based.


Call of Duty single player campaigns are fun but if I purchase the game for the story I am screwed because I just paid $60 for a 5 hour story. I get no enjoyment from the multi player so the only reason I keep the game around is because of the co op (combat training). Black Ops is the only one out of the series that I own because of this. Yeah I know MW2 had spec ops but it was limited to 2 players at a time so it is not the same. 


The most recent game that suffers from this is Homefront a game with so much promise because the story was so fascinating but never really got it going during the actual game itself. If the multi player was the point of making this game then why even create a single player portion at all? The development time could have been used to make the multi player better and you can use the story for a game that can benefit from it. I finished this game in about 5.5 hours and I was looking forward to it for months and I was extremely disappointed. The brilliance of this story was over shadowed by the fact that they are making a Call of Duty clone. I was hoping for a better thought out game with actual elements of great story telling and that took chances. Instead I got a great intro, newspaper clippings that attempt to drive the story, a voiceless main character and a cookie cutter design. But wait it has MULTI PLAYER!!! The multi player is set before the game is so not even that is cohesive. I long for the day where a company will say you know we have a brilliant story and let's focus on delivering that. Oh wait we have that they are called Irrational Games the makers of Bioshock. 


Bioshock is the example of what I am saying they made an FPS with a story, nurtured that story and did not focus on multi player at all because they know the power of story telling. Is there room for multi player in story driven games? Sure there is as long as it doesn't interfere with the story then I am all for it. 


A lot of people said Sony was crazy for putting out games like MAG and SOCOM Confrontation, in my opinion they got it right. They didn't try to force it, they said we want something multi player and that's what they focused on. End of story.


Let's just think about something, are people willing to pay $60 for a multi player game? Yes I think they are. I mean Call of Duty can just be multi player and it will still sell like crazy. For fuck's sake it has a menu option that says load multi player by default. 


Homefront you are a disappointment not because you were a bad game but because you are a follower. KAOS and THQ grow some balls, experiment and innovate or you will always be the company whose games people play while they are waiting for the new Call of Duty. And please if you are going to make a voiceless hero at least let me play co op with a voiceless partner.


Is Mass Effect 3 out yet? 

Very funny how things work

Three years ago I graduated college. I quickly landed this nice job as a designer for the luxury boating industry, in Fort Lauderdale where is known as the yachting capital of the world. Graduating has many consequences when you find yourself with a fat paycheck for the first time in your life (that's before Sallie Mae comes knocking on your door), look at yourself in the mirror and say "man, I'm a professional now..." It becomes addicting that anything is possible and you want to behave as an adult, being that you just got slapped in the face with your "adult permit" and the "you're on your own" certificate. I felt as lucky as I could and quickly changed things around, and fully upgraded because "I deserved it". I moved to a bigger apartment to fit my style and living expectations, got around to buy a smartphone (because business people need to be connected, and I am business) and even got around to buy some stock. What else can I do with a sudden strong flow of cash? What adults do on TV. Decided to invest, I looked around for the things I cherished the most in my brand new life, materially speaking. I loved my brand new Mac, my Verizon smartphone and  my news feed on iGoogle. So, I did very little research and invested substantial (at the time) amounts of money in stock from Apple, Verizon and Google.

One thing that I didn't know, otherwise retrieving from my decision to invest (which would have been a mistake), was that I graduated at the "worst possible time". I put that in quotes because I can think of worse times than rich people not being able to afford their lifestyle therefore firing people that need the money desperately, but that's another $20 as the town folk would say. I went ahead and invested anyway, just for doing something risky that felt right and out of pure sympathy from the little consumer devil on my left shoulder.

Times changed quickly and everybody seemed desperate. All of a sudden all the boats were on sale, but nobody was buying. I was sitting nervously on my desk, knowing that I hadn't done absolutely anything so far on that given day. The workload wasn't flowing, I was working less and people we're getting laid off left and right. It was economic apocalypse, and what did I know? I was just the little guy waiting to be released of my duties and on the worst case scenario, would be forced to face a cruel world as some of my colleagues did. What would I do? By this time, Sallie Mae was already on my case (and will continue to be as far as my eyes can reach the horizon on my figurative timeline). So what does a trembling chiwawa do? I got the answer: retrieve. 

My stock was worth close to nothing. I followed day by day negative numbers on a little application that was dedicated to give me specific numbers on my investment and willingly reminded me of how much I didn't know what I was doing. So, abruptly, I took a decision to lose even more money and sell the little I had invested. I walked out with literally close to 20% of what I had put in. I needed the money, the Earth was flat and I was reaching the border. As I wasn't ready to fall into oblivion with more debt (which I eventually managed to do anyway), I took as little as I could and paddled my way back. Bad decision.

What happened from there 'till now?

• new iPhones 
• iPad 
• iPhone on Verizon 
• iPad on Verizon 
• Google Chrome
• Android operating system

<span> If I didn’t sell anything back then, and focused on what was really happening, I could potentially be sitting on a pile nowadays, and I am referring to a pile of money. Maybe I’m exaggerating, but I know for a fact that the original amount that I put in would have close to tripled in the last 3 years.

I am happy to say, however, that the uneducated decisions of a new born adult can sometimes lead to great growth. Maybe not monetarily, but I’ve grown as a person who understands this, and that my friends is my success story. The story of my failure.

Now the facts: I managed to keep my job, boats are selling, freelance is coming in and I lead a happy life with what little I have. It only comes to show that if one invests in life, it pays.

:)

By Alberto Orsini

www.albertoorsini.com

The revolution is now

With all of the money people spend on games yearly it's no wonder more companies want a piece of the pie. Look at MTV Games a few years ago they purchased Harmonix so they can get in on it, Disney did as well and they have released games under Buena Vista games. Anyway not the point to me writing this. 

Today I read a post with bits and pieces from a speech Iwata gave. Apparently he is butt hurt that casual gamers are moving away from the Wii and the DS well sir let me be the first to tell you, you did it to yourself. Do not focus solely on the casual gamer that is the wrong strategy, good short term but bad in the long run. Also this is not the point of me writing this.

During the speech he kept using the word devaluing for free games and cheap games. Devaluing is a strong word Iwata what you are saying is that cheap games and free games make games worthless. Is that truly the case? I mean the people who are losing the most would be Nintendo because of the type of software they allow to crowd their system. 

But let's look at it on the flip side, game creators of all types love games, I am not talking about the CEO's of these companies I mean the people who actually create these games. So now game creator A wants to make game X because he thinks that he can sell a few copies, make some decent money and hell he is making a game. So he starts looking into making console games because of course everyone he knows has a console and it would be cool to make a game so people he knows can play on their console. Then he gets the bad news he is going to be working on a small project so Nintendo won't sell him a development kit because he doesn't make games from an office. So game creator A looks at other alternatives and he think hand held systems oh baby DS here I come. Oh no the DS dev kit falls under the same rules as the Wii no office no dev kit. 

Game creator A just wants to make game X that's all. Then he keeps digging and he figures cell phones are they way. So he looks it up and he finds out he can make his game for the iPhone, Android and webOS for $125 and he can work from home and not even need all of the phones to test on because all of these smartphone SDKs have emulators. He then can create his game have control over every aspect of it and not have to mortgage his house just to make part of his dream come true.

"But certainly it seems like, when content is being created and made available for free, that it is devaluing content, and is potentially devaluing the expectation of consumers for what content should be." What the fuck does that even mean Reggie? That making games available for free makes games worthless or just Nintendo games?  

I see it this way I could buy Wii Music for 49.99 and get stuck with a load of shit pressed onto a disc or I can buy Plants vs Zombies on my iPod touch for 2.99. So here is my argument to anyone Why the fuck would I spend 50 to 60 dollars on what could potentially be a shit game (Stranglehold) and be really pissed off or get Angry Birds for 99 cents hate but I would be out just a buck.

The revolution is now guys, more of us are using these alternative channels to distribute what we want and we have control on what we charge for it. Noah and his band gives away their music because they believe in the art. And people have the audacity to pay for bullshit like Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber? Money isn't everything Iwata I mean for you it is because you are the CEO of a company but when I can get Plants vs Zombies for the iPod for 3 bucks and have to pay 20 for the same game on the DS that pisses me off and what makes me even more mad is that it looks better on the iPod.

The only thing I see being devalued here is your opinion on what the value of games are,

Oh and by the way you should really look into creating a new character and franchise I mean Mario, I guess he's cool but I am not really looking forward to seeing yet another game which that cunt peach gets kidnapped. I know that story hasn't been beat to death because you still have the Universe to explore but give us something new already and I don't mean something stupid like a heart rate monitor that plugs into the Wii cause that's fucking lame.

And it all started with a bullet

Usually these posts and their heading don't have nothing to do with one another but this one is a little different. So Bulletstorm a decent enough game and I sort of enjoyed my time with it, but it's time for a trade in and thus the following.


I started checking since Friday for trade-in values for this game and came up with the following Gamestop $20 (mind you the game has been on the market less than 4 days), Best Buy (I didn't even know they did trades) is sitting @ $37 for the trade and Amazon @ $40. In all fairness Gamestop does have a trade in special so you get 50% more so it'll bring the credit up to $30. 


There is a game that is coming out called Homefront which I really want so the trek begins to pre-ordering this game. I look @ the same 3 companies for pre-orders and all of them have pre-order bonuses, so then I look @ trade value vs the best pre-order bonus so I settled on Best Buy because they have a Homefront branded headset as a pre-order bonus. 


Off I go to my local Best Buy(Coral Springs), they have a sign near customer service that says Trade in your used games here for Best Buy gift cards. Now I'm happy because I am going to trade in my game for $37 and reserve the game I want so I can get a pre-order bonus that I don't need but it's also a local store and I don't have to mail it to get a gift card (yeah Amazon I'm talking about you), So the first question the customer service rep asks is if I have my receipt, I say no because all I am doing is trading a game in and not returning. They say in order for us to trade the game in we need to have your Best Buy receipt, so I ask and if I didn't purchase it @ a Best Buy what then? They refer me to the website to do the trade in there or you can go to the other store (Sawgrass) and they can do it there because they are a larger store and all. So I say that doesn't make sense but okay. Now I'm on my way to the other store and lo and behold the customer service representative asks me for my Best Buy receipt, so I begin to explain to this nice young lady that I just drove from the other store and that they say I could trade it in @ this store, she apologized but you know there is nothing she can do really. Now I am really pissed and I leave. 


Now the decision is do I go online and pre-order it from Amazon and do the trade in there as well? Or take the 4 to 7 dollar hit and go to Gamestop which is local. I know this for sure I won't be doing any game related business with Best Buy anymore. A shame really I was looking forward to doing business there as competition is healthy.


As far as Best Buy goes you need to have a sign in-store that states that you accept trades for games that were purchased ONLY @ Best Buy, this way you admit defeat before you even start. 


Do you want to use the Gamestop business model for game trades and reserves? Then learn how to do it. It's not hard really you have the foot traffic just learn how to do it and do it effectively and you can make this a huge part of your bottom line. Remember you are not the only place that people purchase their games and you should know that. Either do it right or don't do it @ all. This is why there different places to shop, and because you have no idea how to handle gamers and those needs you have killed a new gaming customer relationship before it even began. I would rather get less money for a trade and less of a pre-order bonus than to do business there.


Ah Amazon you wicked online temptress. We need a local place that will actually want to compete with Gamestop but they are all too chicken shit to do so, either that or they get bought out by Gamestop. 

Beautiful Musings

Forums to me have to be some one of the ways to easily spot ignorance. Now we all have our right to bitch about things god knows I do, but at least do it with some sort of intelligence (not like most people have that). So I am reading some forums because I want to get someone else's take on certain trends (I'm talking mobile not fucking fashion) and I see it all the time, shit like "if company X wants to succeed they should do this" or "I can believe this company is doing this cause it sucks". Now here is the thing, some companies do things they feel is right for the company and of course some of us are going to be alienated but think about it mass market appeal is what some companies want.


Take for example Apple, as much as I dislike Apple they have a way of doing things that make sense. When they decided to launch a tablet so many people (mac fanboys included) bitched about how stupid it was. Can you even imagine if Apple decided maybe our fans are right we should cease production on this iPad device and listen to them. Well the iPad accounts for 17% of their total revenue, 17%!!! This company does what they think needs to be done in order for their revenues to keep growing. Yes some people feel left out because that's not what they wanted Apple to put out. Here is a forum post I found and I need to share this with you guys, "I can't believe this! All this hype for something so ridiculous! Who cares about another freaking MP3 player? I want them to think differently! Why oh why would they do this?! It's so wrong! It's so stupid!" This was posted on a mac forum back in October 2001 after Apple announced the iPod. Imagine if that guy was in charge of Apple and said that well the company would probably be no where instead of the powerhouse that they are. 


Companies give a fuck about your opinion until they have your money is it wrong? I guess but a company has to make money no matter what. Vote with your wallet you idiot, you self-absorbed self-important prick. I did, I purchased a phone last year hated it, returned it, most people love the phone (Evo 4G) also let me clear something up I hated the OS not the hardware, the point is I voted with my wallet. If a company you support is moving away from the stuff that you supported them for then yeah start looking for alternatives or conform. I didn't conform, my cell carrier is all about Android now but there are alternatives I am just waiting for something I like. If what I want is not available then the very real choice of carrier vs platform is a huge decision. Think of it this way though if the carrier doesn't want to carry your platform is it enough to make you jump ship?


I'm done sorry so long but I have a lot of time to kill. LOL!! 


Flash sucks who the hell needs it? Time to move on.

A moment of perfection

Yesterday was our first brainstorming meeting and it was incredible. Within a few hours we had almost the whole game mapped out, meaning levels planned, bonus stages and a million other ideas that were discussed.

The plan of action at this point in time is very simple, art, art and well art. This is the part where initial designs will come together. I have one rough sketch so far and a few others on the way. It is critical at this point to remember that not all of the ideas will make it in to the final game but the ideas we did have might their place in some way shape or form. 

Yesterday it was five of us throwing ideas out so fast it was getting hard to keep up but the creative energy in that room was amazing. We discussed user experience, also game play mechanics and even sound. This is from one sketch and a small discussion about a yr ago. Said discussion has spawned the idea for 2 games. 

And that's why I talk a lot BUT I also listen. You never know where inspiration will come from. When inspiration does come, that moment when it hits you is a moment of perfection.

And remember kids K = Black 

Would you like to further your education?

What the fuck is going on here? I am getting bombarded with phone calls and e-mail asking me if I am interested in going back to school. I mean really? is school attendance that far down that you have to start cold calling people and asking them if they want to go back to school.


I love how they try to get you too, "you know with this recession going on it's always a good idea to go back to school this way you can blaaaaah blahhhhh blllllah". Such a pain in the ass. And then they say well computer are really a good field to get into. I say yeah 12 years ago. Computer techs now have A+ certifications but make like 10 an hr now. Web development you can learn online for almost free. N+ certification pretty inexpensive as well. Programming is harder to learn but with a few books and a good compiler you can learn that too. 


Why the fuck would I pay 30K to some fucking school to learn something I can learn on my own? For a piece of paper that says I know how to do it? Times are hard I mean if you're a kid yeah it'll make sense. 18 yrs old don't know shit, yeah go spend the money. But in your 30's have bills a mortgage making ends meet is hard, sure let's pile on new school debt to it all. I'd rather shoot myself in the face with a remote control rocket launcher. Brings me to an earlier point, if college attendance is that far down maybe it's because IT'S TOO FUCKING EXPENSIVE TO GO TO SCHOOL!!!People probably can't afford it. And you know the amount of debt that you incur yeah it'll take yrs to pay off.


I'm not saying don't further your education but if you choose not to I understand. So early so angry so sorry.

Oh man

I just received the first piece of concept work and it looks fucking amazing and it's a rough, Paul Carnegie is a fucking bad ass to be sure. I can wait to show you guys all this stuff.

We are trying to setup a meeting between us all just to get some brainstorming done. Let's see what comes of Sunday, maybe Monday I'll have some juicy stuff to show you.

Budgeting is killing us so everything is going to be super polished for what we can afford. Super huge thanks to NDA company for hooking us up with free app submission. WOO HOO!!! Getting good now. 

Also noticed that I actually get a little money for those ads, so help us out instead of us asking for a loan to help pay for the games and stuff click an ad or two we are using it to help with the funding.

More to come soon!!!

Part of the wait is over

Now under NDA and it feels great. The project has a future and the name and logos are going to come together soon. We will let the cat out of the bag soon but there are parts we will not be able to discuss of course but this is going to ROCK. 

I got the e-mail about 15 minutes ago. I am extremely happy needless to say but I have to share it. Onward and upward as they say.

Check you guys tomorrow.

This wait sucks

Going through pre-production really does suck. Just a ton of waiting and waiting. Waiting to see how the first pieces of concept are looking, whether or not applications I have filled out for where I want our games to appear will go through and the worst waiting to see if we are going to be financially ready to take on making games full time.


At this point in time we have concepts and ideas nothing else to really go on except a ton of talent and dedication from the small group we have. Managing this group is simple for me because we are all on the same page all we have to do is execute (harder than it sounds). Time is always the biggest factor, since we have no true budget we have to work on this stuff on our spare time. So after a long day of work or school we work, sending e-mails, making phone calls and texting like crazy.


This is the stuff that dreams are made of. A very smart man named Rahul Sood said "Entrepreneurship is living a few years like most people won't, so you can spend the rest of your life like most people can't."


Sounds good to me.


ODG FTW! 

A dawn of a new day

So I have been sitting here thinking about some of the stuff I want to do and the things I have planned. I recently got back in contact with my friend and partner Chris and we have had a few good ideas as of late so we are going to put them in motion. 

This prompted me to re-think this blog and give it some actual structure and just random ramblings even though I'm sure that will still happen but now I am going to use it as sort of like a dev blog. Yes ladies and gentlemen Chris and I own a game company but we have both lacked focus and now I think we are ready. I talked to a few more friends Paul, Jamie, Lucienne and Chad (still missing one) but we are almost ready.

We have a plan for 2 mobile games and we are going to actually work on our site (finally). More details as they happen. But our site should be live in about 3 weeks and we should have a few screen shots by then as well. The site is going to be bare just some contact info a few screenshots and our logo but nothing more than that. We want to get to the meat and potatoes of it all. As far as platforms that's still a bit of a secret I'm waiting to hear back from a few companies so then we can move forward.

Catch ya'll soon.

Carlos

Man, TV truly offers nothing. So I am sitting staring @ the TV and I feel my IQ dropping. It's filled with trash and stupidity. Bad shows worse commercials ah the magic of television. Someone makes all these decisions to put all this shit on TV and they must make tons of money. What does it take to put these shows on the air? And all those commercials ugh, Febreeze Noticeables have  you just tried cleaning your house? 22 seasons of Survivor? What is so real about reality television? How often does a camera crew follow you around? Anyways I am starting to read as now and even though the stuff I am reading aren't considered literary masterpieces it's still a lot smarter that the drivel on TV.

The Dance of the Unidentified

Not the average insolent
little boring sympathy beggar
Keep your expensive acceptance
I prefer my own
I can smoke my own ego in a pipe without having to taste yours.
The indecent part of me likes to battle it out
knowing only that nothing you say can
turn me over
or turn me out
the one thing I have over you is control
I roll on and you roll back
I took the trash to the corner and found
myself smiling in your puddle of drool...
so much panting for one little day...
all one way
all the same
all cuts down to one small thing...
attention gained the wrong way
stays the wrong way
and the faces people make at you
will keep you tanked and suspicious
and you never come around
never see that it's all you
all your misery is you
all your suicidal threats
all of your singing and dancing...
you are the only one who hears the music
but we all watch you dance
and it's all in your mind
because no one is watching you
and no one hears the music
it's blown your mind...
how best to keep friends...
how best to be
it's blown your mind that you can be anything but what you are....
take it with you...
pinch it all you want
I don't think you will wake up
I don't think you will ever be aware.
Hold on...it's going to be years before you finish dying
but you started so long ago.
Such surrender
to the insignificant
such devotion to the world of superficiality
and false identity
and all for what?
to come across the way you never meant to.
who's that girl.
you don't even know yourself.

By: Zaida 

I can keep rhythm with no metronome

The way I see is that sleep no matter how necessary it's hard to deal with. I mean look I love sleeping but the fucking bitch escapes me. I used to think I just liked staying up late but I realized little by little I have a hard time sleeping. What's worse is that I actually fall asleep for abt 20 minutes then poof I'm wide awake for hours. As of now I'm just trying to watch something to fall asleep so I can get up early tomorrow but now I'm thinking about what else I have to watch. 


I was reading Insomnia a few weeks ago and I felt a lot of what was happening. The sleeping quickly but the waking earlier and earlier or the taking forever to fall asleep. The latter is called Sleep-Onset Insomnia that's the one I suffer from with a sprinkling of Transient Insomnia. I just want this to end so I can sleep. Tick Tock Tick Tock 


That's some bad hat Harry.

As consumers wander

As we took a trip to our local mall I started thinking about how people mill around the mall. So we get there and the milling is in full effect staring at the sales in the windows of all of these different stores. Of course it's Valentine's Day so the mall if full of people wearing red and holding hands with others. There are GIANT signs that say Love and Be My Valentine and of course I smile because some guy named Valentine was executed on this day and thus we now have Valentine's Day. Where was I going with this... Oh yeah so as I watch all these people buying shit they don't need spending money they don't have I wonder how this society has become so powerless and sheepish. How did we get to the point where buying stuff makes us happier than learning something new or holding a conversation about something deeper than the case you have around your iPhone? So as you wander around your local money wasting establishment in search of that ever needed product X that's going to change your life for 48 hrs before you put it in your closet and head out to look for the next ever needed product try to ask yourself is this really truly needed? Not like that will happen but I like to dream.

Funny I read something the other day that says common sense is so rare it should be a superpower. Think about that.

My first blog post

Ok so a friend of mine (:cough Sam cough:) has been telling me that I should have a blog, so now I have one and I'm not happy so far. So I am going through the you're stupid so let us design it for you portion of the site and lo and behold guess what I find? NO ACCESS TO COMIC SANS!!! What kind of travesty is this I want it to look the way I want but I can't choose my own font?!?! So I went with Arial and Helvetica because I can't even choose Papyrus.


Anyways this is my first post and it was pretty tame so ya'll come back periodically and it might make you laugh, cry, think and curse up a storm but most likely not at the same time and even more likely not in that order.